Turning old cassettes into MP3s

First we had a turntable that allows you turn your LPs into MP3s. It was like magic. Now comes an equally killer product: The ION Tape Express Plus, which allows you to rip those old mix tapes from the '70s, '80s, '90s.

I have hundreds of cassettes in my garage that have been sitting idle because I have nothing to play them on (my one outlet, the tape deck in a 16-year-old Ford Explorer, went kaput earlier this year). But beyond that, there are hundreds of songs that I have only on tape that I'd love to save while I can.

Unlike records, cassettes have much shorter life spans, as the data flakes or gets chewed up when tape heads get cranky. So I need to move fast to save some of that old music, much of which has never been released on CD (including recordings by my old band, The Coyotes). And there are a ton of my renowned mix tapes that I'd like to save for posterity. Those things are like 90-minute trips down memory lane, and are priceless in many ways.

So, Santa Claus, can you bring me a tape-to-MP3 device?